drunk again...

I am the only person i know who has never been drunk.
honestly, I dont know a single friend.
and its like... kinds disappointing sometimes
when i hear people say "i seriously dont even remember!"
its sad to me.
who wants that kinds of experience?
one you cannot even remember?
no matter how funny it was. i just reaaaally dont get it!
plus it tastes so gross!
so even if i wanted to... i couldnt do it!
its just tastes baaaaad.
gross. id rather be alive, awake, alert, enthusiastic... with a soda in my hand.
:] oh yaaaaa. :]

so its just something i really dont get. i really cannot understand it.
expecially when its someone i know who is religious.
and then i see them drunk in pictures.
or drinking in them... or talking about getting drunk
it just seems a bit hypocritical to me. and i dont like it.


but what i do like...
is my best friend cassandra claire.
who is obsessed with buying people right now.
so beware!

i got bored.... what can i say...

He is the number one in my life. finding love with someone who is your best friend is amazing. I am so happy with my life. maybe we arent in the most ideal location... but my home life is perfect. I fall more in love with each passing day. He is amazing. I am really lucky.

This girl is the number one girl in my life. we have the most amazing relationship anyone could ask for. like seriously? who can get in a big fight... for months... not talking. but always thinking of eachother. and then when we get back together... we are back the exact same way as if we had seen eachother the day before. we are those friends who talk about everything... not kidding, EVERYTHING. even stuff no one should mention. like weird boul movements. haha. we are weird and perfect best friends. never having to worry about being judged. or feeling stupid. we always understand eachother. shes understanding, honest, trustworthy, funny... shes amazing and i love her! now my family... this is my brother and smallest nephew who i call bubba. this picture seriously makes me happy. first of all... my brother is this unknown comedian who can make me pee my pants laughing all day. and my nephew is a bundle of joy. when he isnt smiling you can only asume something is wrong. cause he is always happy. that kid makes me want to have some of my own. he is great... both of them are.

see? isnt this kid just amazing! that smile is contageous. this is how he looks alllll day long. as long as matthew isnt pushing him around! haha. he reminds me alot of his grandpa rich. who he was named after.

this face! haha. he looks like a little hampster to me. stretching his neck out and making a cute squishy face. so cute. :]

now this chef is one chef who can cook anything fo rme.... anytime. :] matty is such a ball of joy. when i call and talk toh im on the phone he will just talk about anything. and i never understand a word of it and just go "oh really?" and he goes "yay!" and i go "was it fun?" and he goes "yey fun ya" so cute.

someone needs a haircut! haha. he is not camera shy. when he sees a camera he just smiles. no matter what he is doing... and he isnt even always looking at the camera! he just smiles his big "chandler" smile. this one isnt bad. but usually its just a crazy smile. thats why i love him so much.

now i get to play with this... which is a little piece of heaven! im tickling matty and richy keeps just grabbing his hair.

trip down south again

they are never long enough. but thats probably because i want to live there with daniel instead of visiting. but at least i do get to visit what? once a month. and that is really alot. but it is hard being so far from everyone. like cas and my dad and mom and brenda and matty and bubba.

so work as been really slow lately. but i thought ive been doing decently. at least making my quota. but i guess not. for the past two months I havent made my productivity goal. and i know that after three months of not making your goal they start warning you that if you dont raise your productivty they can let you go. and thats annoying. its really really slow right now. plus she just in the last few months hired 3 new girls at the same time (practically) so its hard. plus she is changing how the walkins are being passed out. its an "equal" pass out now. like anyone can have it. master, designer, senior... doesnt matter. and i really just dont think thats right. i understand it should be who does it best, or who is best qualified to do the clients hair. but a master stylist really should have their own clientelle and shouldnt count on walkins at all. and a senior i think should get some walk ins but should have their clientelle base down pretty much.
so thats annoying. now the clients dont just go to the new designers. they go to whoever is available and fair passing out. i dont know. maybe im wrong. but i dont see how she expects people to build a clientelle when people who should have a clientelle are getting walk ins. i just dont think its right. it doesnt make sence. but hopefully we will pick up the pase and get more peopl ein the salon.

so i went in to the doctor on monday to get that shot... and so far so good? haha i dont know. it hasnt even been a week yet. so we will see how i react to that shot. ive heard its ups... and its downs. and you never really know how you will react to something until you try it.

anywhoooooooo... i never write in this thing. i always forget. plus nothing new really happens. I go to work Tues-saturady and do hair or not. and sunday and monday are my days off that i do laundry and go on dates and do dishes. thats life. its a good one. Daniels pretty amazing. so im happy. :] he makes me that way.

hair

so i am growing out my hair. so that evenutally I will have this cute haircut that ive always wanted. something Ic an do curly and straight. I miss my curly hair! I LOVE my curly hair! i always have. but Daniel likes it when i "do" my hair. which really means straighten it. because when i would wear it curly it was never done done. id get the response "are you going to do your hair?" even if i already did... and i know he means nothing by it. and ive always wanted a "bob" ish cut. not a total a-line like posh spice. slightly shorter in the back. but not as layered as hers... or as short. I am really excited.

i was originally going to just grow out my hair with little trimmin and no coloring. but i could not handle it. so i did it red all over. no black and bright red streeks. just red. and then once i get it longer ill do the blonde (or if i cant get blonde something lighter) ontop. and eventually i will have the cut and color. and love it! :] I cant even wait. to have a cut i really love again. nothing too long... nothing too short. just right.

I miss my family. I miss them way alot. WAYYY alot. like more than you even know. Everytime I call and hear their voice, expecially my nephew... that innocent beautiful voice... i just melt down. and I get to see them once a month... ish. haha. and still its just not enough. I am just hopeing and praying Daniel gets into Cal-tech. that way i know he will still be going to a school that he really really wants to. not like ucla... or something lame. because i want to have him go to where he REALLY wants to go to. like the ideal school. its just hard when i get homesick. my family is my other half. and i know he understands that. and i know he would sacrifice what school he goes to for me. but i dont want him to have to. Its hard.

cause well start having kids a few years into grad school. so in about 3-4 years well start having kids. and ideally... i want to live close to my family and Cas. and I want ot be able to stay home and not work. or just work part time.

got to go cut daniels hair.

Cassandra Claire is my best friend

This is the life of Cas and I! haha. for some reason we cannot take a good picture together of us just smiling. Weve been friends for over 8 years... and loving it!

this is BACK in the day. our junior/senior year. not sure but highschool days for sure. We try hard to take good photos... but it always comes out bad. eventually... we will give up. watch and see...

another attempt for a good photo. we give up on smiles and do silly stuff. it comes put better.

sweet sweet love. kisses all around

SUPRISE! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

cas and i taking webcam pics... it was dark... and for some reason i turned out that i am black.

I am black... enough said.

bestfriends... little devils. halloween of 04 i think. or 05

up close and personal! we attempt good photos often... and rarely succeed! ps why is my hair orange?

another one. and why am i so freakishly tall? like i tower over ALL in this picture.

i defenitly love this girl. PEACE!!!!!!

Cas and I are the best of friends. no matter what... we are always there for eachtoher. thats what makes us so great.

This is the backround to my computer... AKA my LIFE.

I love my family... and CASSANDRA CLAIRE.

and it really looks like cas is the only one who reads this... so i will respond to her comment.

its like... i would love to make friends... but not really.

because if i am only going to be here for another year.

Id rather not have another person to miss when i leave somehwere.

I am already going to miss some people at work.

its weird... i know. but i just miss everyone.

and i wish i lived closer to work.

that way my friends at work... can be my friends in life.

and i do want to find a church.

anyway... i am better today.

i have my emotional moments.

but i love my family.

i cant help it!

i have the best family anyone could ask for.

and the most amazing best friend ever.

so you cant blame me for missing what i am used to having.

i call daily. and i visit monthly. and its really great.

I'll be back in no time.

one hour sadness

so i got pretty emotional today.

i was at work at it was comming to the end of my day.
and i had 30 minutes to go... and it was going by reeeaaally slow.
and i noticed no one really talking to me.
and then i heared peoples convos.
and i realized none of these people are like really great friends.
like we all get along, i enjoy working with everyone.
but its like... i dont feel like anyone would ask me to hang out outside of it.
its a weird feeling. makes me feel lonely.
just makes me realize jus thow alone i am here.
All i have is Daniel. and thats really it.

Cause like i used to have Daniel for my life.
and then I had Victoria during work to hang with.
and I had my family 20 min away that Id see once a week.
and Cas was so close, and we'd get together often.

and its like here i am. going to work with idiots
and they really DRIVE ME NUTs sometimes.
like a freakin monkey can do some of this stuff!
ringing up clients isnt a skill.

i dont know. i just got really really emotional and sad.
its really hard to be away from everyone sometimes.

I love Daniel. I love him so much. I would go to the end of the earth for him.
and I will. because being married to daniel is the best thing ever. and i wouldnt trade anything for what i have.

He is amazing. He makes things better with just a smile.

ok... bedtime.